This I Have Learned

    High school contained what was probably some of the greatest, yet hardest, times of my entire life, and through all the good, the bad, and the stressful, I know I can say that it was all worth it. While my workload in freshman year is almost a joke to what it was in junior and senior year you would think that as the years went by my life would have seemed to be a lot more stressful and taxing when this really isn't the case. Yes, I had more homework, had days where I had to study for 5 tests the next day, and proceed to go to club meetings/ sports practice, it didn't feel as frustrating as what I thought it was going to be when I was a freshman and sophomore. I feel like I would have to attribute this to two of the most important things I learned in high school which are time management and always try to roll with the punches. 

    In freshman and most of my Sophomore year, my classes weren't that rigorous so I could practically study for tests the night before or not at all to earn an A grade. Once junior year started I knew that would have to change since my courseload was more difficult. In the beginning, I still didn't change that much and my first tests in AP Chem GBBE were both low C's. I couldn't just study the day before and get away with it anymore, I had to be more efficient with my time so I could get my grade back up to an A. While procrastination would still get to me, and it still does from time to time, I was able to set times for when I would study and made sure they were spread out so I wouldn't have to study a lot for multiple tests in one day. I would also try to balance this with my extracurriculars so I wouldn't have to study that much during the evening after just doing fencing practice for 2 hours. I was able to get AP Chem and GBBE back to A's and maintained it with my other classes.

    There were times where I would study a lot but still get a B or C on some assessments and it would always ruin my day with negativity and pressured thoughts. The best way for me to get over this would be to always remember that nobody can change the past, what's done is done and there is no point in worrying about what has already happened. Instead, I tried to figure out what I did wrong and that would sometimes mean going after class to talk to my teacher about it so I wouldn't repeat the same mistake again. Sometimes I would talk to my friends about their scores and theirs would be higher than mine. I used to feel really ashamed but after around the middle of junior year, I started to get over it. Yes, it would still sting a little in the beginning but I would get over it pretty quickly since it's meaningless to feel regret over what has happened. I would always try to focus on the present and future but always use the past as a means of learning and growth. 

    English this past year has probably been the best English class that I have ever taken. While it still is pretty awkward talking to people sometimes on zoom I have loved all the books we have read but most importantly the themes and messages that they have had. Siddhartha taught me the value of living a balanced life, Death of a Salesman taught me the importance of finding true happiness in your life even if it means it not lasting forever such as an immortal legacy, and Waiting for Godot which taught me to always try and finding meaning in the present, even when it could be waiting for something that may never come. Hopefully, I will remember to take away the things that I have learned in my English/high school career and use them when I go to college this fall and beyond.